Question

If everything is you and you create your reality and this is all apart of my subconscious then what about when I die... What about if I was you and I just died but everyone else lives on... Is it the souls imagination and so we are still alive when we leave the body so everything lives on. 

Actually I suppose when a star dies all the rest of the stars still shine ... No oh well there's his subconscious gone that's the end. 

More like a universal subconscious a thread of us all.. So are we all one or are we a huge one but seperate souls are the energy life force that makes it all. So the energy in us in our souls is all one? And I recycle when I die which would explain that theory. Theory of everything .... 

Brain wave 

Print festival

http://www.visitblackburn.co.uk/whats-on/blackburn-printfest-p754340

My Venus print featured on the link above, 20-22nd February I'll be a part of Blackburn's first Print festival. 

New moon creative mind

Well I went to bed painting some watercolours last night...

 

   

They was not intentionally for the new moon, but for friends, this is long time out standing image they asked me to produce and I was full of ideas. 

Also during the day of the 20th, new moon, at work I subconsciously explored some watercolours... In the morning I thought iv haven't used them for ages and just picked them up. Then I sat there in a blank mind and when ever I do that I tend to draw venus ....

But then I noticed a drop I made ...

 

And it fascinated me watching the colours mix, so I began to explore...

And explore more...

I really like the out come, subconscious flow of energy of colour of life, a reflection of the universe = me = in the paint. Meditative, I wonder how this could translate to an installation, environment of some kind.

Today I want to paint more, I have lots of ideas and I feel with watercolour it's a quick yet free medium.. By free I mean i can't control it. I like that I loose control then I can connect with it somehow it's a flow from inside out to the paintbrush to the paper. This is a constant theme in me, I work with paint very much in this way (most of the time) using a lot of water and trying to loose control, but then I also use block brush strokes for life drawing in which I just become immerse in the colour and lines that I loose the control almost to the energy between the body me and the brush/board. 

Is it a reflection of the whole of life, the whole universe? Our push pull between control and letting go, death and life. Do we forget that every moment is a death. And can we remember we are infinite... We are infinite. We are infinite. We are infinite. 

Infinite subconsious = soul = water and paint .... The subconscious mind .... Reality... Cosmos... Our eyes... Losing thought ....connection with another dimension. 

Poetry notes

Process Of Abstraction

I found these images of a painting I began in my third year. It was because I had stopped watching the news and found out about the typhoon that had hit a part of the world and it disturbed me I was unaware so many people was suffering. I was propelled in to a shock wave of feeling disconnected and found a urge to reconnect through a painting. This canvas was recycled and there was no harming of the earth in this production btw. 

What I wanted to share was how I started with this imagery and ideas and then over time I completely went over the typhoon inspired work ... Which I do not have a picture of the "final piece" ... But I do know it then evolved into a huge angel like figure in deep purples and pinks and blues. Again I completely washed over this stage with white! Left over emulsion in the studio space and used a wall roller to cover it entirely. I then was handed some left over blue paint from a studio friend to which I threw on the canvas and added water with and left with intention of this becoming an interesting background. 

Over the next couple of weeks I had it spread out in the studio and I would rock the water back and forth along the canvas and add more blue or more water just to be playful and allow the subconscious flow from the paint on the canvas. 

One day I just felt like moving the canas out of the way and stood it up, the water wasn't dry which added the drips you can see on the final image. I really enjoyed the final image but was advised that I wasn't an abstract painter and should be concentrating on my final show piece which again I was advised should be the figure which I had consistently worked with through the years. So I discarded this and thought I'll chop it down to a square so I can then use it to go with another 2 square 5 by 5 canvas I had which already had figure paintings on them. 

I never did paint over the abstract blue and white as a new tutor spoke to me about what I wanted from my art and advised me that art is exsprimentation and that a good piece of art is a good piece of art. I shouldn't paint over it and she told me that actually she sees me more in this painting than she could in the Venus figures I had been painting. She could see the struggle in this and advised that is actually goes with my print making more. It is timeless in infite and I think it's the circle. And also like what Rothko and Newman tried to achieve with their abstracts. Which is what I was writing Vauguely about in my dissertation... But more focussing on art as a way propel the viewer into the now...into an awe inspiring moment but not with a painting or a print or a sculpture or a light space like Turrell but with an experience. And which is what I wanted to do then for my final piece and which is what I'd like to create in art now. To alienate in an environment to pull in the viewer to see. New to see and move in a space and react to it. 

Your Mind Drafted

Look to the sky = infinity

Projections never ending
Tapping
Screen, a screen of clouds
Of light
And of dark in night
All present in me
And yes the world is round !
= a projection
In your reflection
Of our own
Boundless skin
Immortal soul
And these cycles, they spin
Worlds upon worlds
In worlds of worlds
They speak
Listen quietly... Whispers
A pod of secrets
You = universe
Pop digest grow

Darkness

What better way to compare contrast of this truth: in darkness we see the light.

For in day the stars still shine, yet with dark is when we see the shine, we see the light.

It is in darkness we see the light.

It is with night the eyes see the stars.

Lightbulb moment 2013 as I walked from sunset to the darkness along the canal and followed by this mind map of stars...

Stars

When you look at the stars. You notice there glow, they twinkle. Then balance is lost, a wobble, light headed. Find centre, do the stars move. They seem to buzz slightly, ever slightly moving. Vibrational. 
Are the stars moving?
Or are we? Am I moving, on earth, is the vibration I see a movement of time, of space.

And I'd it not interesting to ponder, why colour is lost when the sun goes down.
The water looks black and in day it is green. Is it? No, that's what I perceive ... In fact the water colour changes with the sun. Is anything a solid colour? Water shines glistening white with sun. So without the sun light out eyes see black. (Of course there is artificial light, something that I am not pondering here as I stand on the canal)

The 3 stars stand in unison tonight, I don't remember the last time I stopped and embraced the dark at night. To look up at the universe above, the universe. Araions belt as we name it so, they feel like home to me. Yet I stand so apart from them. Here on earth, one human being. A soul inside this body.  Do we hold the universe inside us. How does the moon resignate so deep in a person.

Why now is the air so quiet. I set off at twilight and have never heard nature so loud. So happy. Chattering. Birds, singing beautiful melodies to me. Now dark has arrived the light has faded the last half of the sky and it is silent.

Only noise I here is a distant motorway, a buzz. And I know it us the sound of movement, bodies moving through time rushing to there destination. Where are they hoing, why do we seek to move and go. There is something moving in the way I stand hair blowing gently in the wind, stood in the dark of the canal, whilst I can see a country road lit with street orange glow and hear the buzz of the motorway. Being still and hearing movement. Time comes still. After I look from my phone screen up, the sky is illuminated even more so. Dazzling glowing spots. Science tells is are glowing balls of gas. They are so much more.

Look up at the stars and feel there energy, your presence and the movement in the air on this earth. How peaceful to be outside the box we inprison ourselves in, to open our eyes to our true place. Connected. What does it remind you, today I'm reminded more of stillness, to intuitively connect to the infinit life energy that balances above or heads. To do this outside of our walls. (Even when the moon visits my window I  gaze upon him and have that same feelings, wholeness.)